Can a Person Really Change — Permanently?

 

Can a person truly change from who they once were to a different individual? This is not a change in work habits, weight loss or being more punctual. This is a deep and profound change of heart. A drunkard, a liar, a philanderer, a cheat, an addict, a reprobate, a murderer, a child molester — can their hearts change to the point that they are no longer even tempted with those evils anymore?

True change is not controlling the desires that are bad, it is no longer having those desires; as if the desires were never there at all.

The cynic and the skeptic dismiss this thought immediately. For them it is easier to deny that anything could change than to face up to the fact they may have big problems that need fixing. The doubter might say that some people might be able to change but certainly not them.

There are countless stories of people who underwent this radical change over the centuries. In the 4th century Augustine was a complete reprobate but changed to be a leader in the church and one of its greatest philosophers. The man who wrote the hymn “Amazing Grace” was once a slave trader. Today we have stories of addicts, gang members, and murderers who have completely changed.

Most people who call themselves Christians have some idea of this life altering change. They might be able to point to some examples in the Bible such as the Apostle Paul but far too many either do not believe it happens anymore to any great extent or feel that total change is so rare as to be inaccessible for most.

Some of this resistance and disbelief comes from the idea that a person must “pay” for their wrongs in some manner before they can truly be freed from them. This is untrue. However, it does allow the resistant and disbelieving person a rationale that protects them from appreciating God’s grace and incredible forgiveness towards people.

A person close to me, who is a faithful churchgoer, is aghast at the idea that anyone who has done vile things can ever be forgiven enough to be allowed in Heaven. He would be one of the people extremely upset at the thought of a convicted child murderer moving into his area who claims to have been changed, redeemed and is living with the local pastor.

To be fair, there are also countless stories of people who claimed they changed only for them to fall off the wagon for short periods of time or totally revert to their former ways. Therefore, you can understand people questioning such a radical transformation. Not every story has a happy ending since not every claim to radical change is the truth. However, to use these stories of failure as a reason to say the other stories carry no weight is intellectually dishonest. People are different.

I have experienced both kinds of change in my life. There has been the change that was temporary, six months or a year, and there has been change that is permanent. The difference? In the temporary change I had to fight to control the temptation. With the permanent change there has been no temptation.

Additionally, the permanent change never occurred until after I gave my heart to Jesus. That is not to say that every change after Jesus was permanent. Far from it. One issue took five years and another took 15 years of on and off temporary changes from the time I was born again until it became permanent.

When I stopped fighting God it allowed Him to start dealing with my issues and making me into the man He wants. So why did it take years for some of my issues to be dealt with? Could not God take care of things all at once?

The answer to this is multi-faceted. First, God most certainly could have dealt with all my issues at once — He is God after all. With me He chose not to with the likely reason being that I was not ready to fully appreciate all the changes at one time. Perhaps it would have made me greedy for other things after having been given so much — only God knows.

Second, any changes in me also had secondary effects on other people. The change that took five years tremendously affected my wife. She had been trying to change me during those years. I am convinced God stretched out the time in order to show her that my change was not by any of her efforts but only by His.

Third, it is always good to be reminded of one’s need for God. The issue that took 15 years to deal with came after I had become successful in my career and had numerous victories in my life. Even with all of these I still had this issue — which was a deeply personal one. I knew I needed God to help me but I was not fully yielding my spirit in order to allow Him to do His work in me. Finally, after reading the book Wartership Down about a group of rabbits (which my wife had encouraged me to read for many years) I was deeply moved. You could see how God had come through for these rabbits (seriously — you need to read this book!) and I finally fully realized that I was missing out on what more He could do for me. It was then that God moved and I was finally rid of this most troubling issue that had haunted me for decades.

You see, it is not that you accept Jesus and that is all there is. God wants to continually improve you. First you have to accept Jesus as your Lord and Savior in order to allow the permanent changes to begin. Then you must strive to keep a soft heart and to be open about continuously growing to become the person God wants you to be — not the person you think you should be.

If you just read the last sentence and grimaced at that thought then your heart is not soft enough for the permanent change you need. Ponder that. Humility in front of an omnipotent God, who has equal portions of grace and judgment, is far better than resistance.