Reconciliation

 

One of the guys I mentor who is in prison is trying to reconcile to the memory of his Dad who did not treat him well.

When I responded to him, I felt some others needed to read what I wrote so I am sharing the basic parts of my note with you.

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I wanted to respond to your last note where you talked about reconciliation so eloquently.

I'm sure you can appreciate why God takes on the persona of a father throughout the Bible as a way to relate to us. Just look at what you said the similarities are between you and God and you and your earthly Dad. Reconciliation is the key. God reconciled to us by Jesus's death on the cross. We reconcile to Him by dying to ourselves and receiving the free gift of salvation by faith.

That's not as easy as it sounds, of course, but it's the essential truth.

But what about your earthly Dad? Of course, God is perfect and your earthly Dad, like every earthly Dad, is far from perfect. Often, earthly Dads won't offer to reconcile with us - or they can't because they are no longer living. What to do?

Well, you can only control what you can control which means you. You can't control others in matters like this. Remember what Jesus said on the cross: "Father, forgive them for they know not what they do." You have to do the same. Again, much easier said than done - at least done properly.

I'm sure you, like me, said "I'm sorry" through gritted teeth more than once. We can do the same with forgiveness. Just saying it and saying it from the heart are two different things. That's the first step in reconciliation. With God, you aren't forgiving Him, you're forgiving yourself. With your Dad, you need to forgive him. That may be a one time thing, or you forgive certain things over a period of time. Either way, forgiveness is necessary before reconciliation can take place, even with someone who is no longer with us. You're reconciling with your memory of him.

Reconciliation is a most noble thing to do. It takes guts since it's easier to stay mad or hurt toward the other person. After all, when we start the reconciliation process, we ultimately find out that it's not always 100% the other person, we had/have some issues that need to be dealt with as well. That's not always easy to face. A boy will stay mad or hurt. A man forgives and reconciles.

I hope I'm making sense. Please ask me to clarify anything. However, I cannot tell you exactly how to go about this. All I can do is encourage you. The Holy Spirit is the one who will guide you through the process, if you let Him.

God the Father is ever faithful and will always be there for you. He loves you so very much and there's not much more that can please Him than if you use His love to reconcile with others.

As a Dad, some of my most joyous times are simply being with my wife and daughter. When we're together and just basking in the love for each other and our shared love of God - it's awesome. It doesn't matter what we're doing. In fact, the less we're doing, the greater the feeling.

You can have the same even though your Dad is no longer with us. Even though you're in your cell, God is always with you since He is spirit. You can always bask in His love. It's even better when your heart is light because you've reconciled with the memory of your earthly Dad.